I have a problem with patience. I admit it, freely. I don’t like waiting in line, I can’t stand slow sidewalk walkers, and I don’t know how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop, and can pretty assuredly say I never will.

I’ve always seen this as a bi-product of my go-getter nature, which is a good thing right? I make things happen. I not only meet deadlines, I do more than expected in less time than it takes others. I’ve never had an interview without getting the job, I’ve never backed down from a challenge, this is just who I am, part of my DNA.

While this part of my personality may be an asset in the workplace, I know it’s not so much in my marriage, and I’m working on it. But here’s the thing that you other patience-challenged friends will get, there is nothing more maddening than when something comes along that is out of your control, that no amount of hustle and go-getting can quicken or bring to fruition.

Here’s the other thing I’m learning, when we try to tackle these perceived problems/setbacks/challenges with the same approach of going above and beyond, and we fall short, again and again, we are missing the point.

We are missing the beauty of simply waiting and we are missing the lessons God is trying to teach us by not giving us what we want when we want it.

But sometimes (most times) we have to learn the hard way, we have to fall and fail many painful and frustrating times to learn that maybe we just need to stay down, wait, don’t get back up. Not yet.

Few things are more frustrating than not getting something that others seem to attain easily. For me that’s having a child, for others it’s happiness/contentment, a career they are passionate about, close friends, a spouse, solid church community or belonging.

When these things are denied or delayed in our lives, I’m learning not to just throw myself into finding solutions or answers first, but to ask what I’m supposed to be learning right now, what are you teaching me in this season God?

Here’s the exciting and new part of this story. Over the past year or so I’ve been content in my waiting, yes there are days of frustration and sadness, but overall, I have peace and contentment. Recently however my contentment has turned to excitement. Hear me out.

I’ve been overwhelmed lately with the spectacular and comforting knowledge that we serve a God who intentionally denies or delays things we want in order to refine us, to grow us, to better us. He is not silent. He is actively, incredibly working in our lives each day to better prepare us for His plans and purposes. I know this may sound really strange to some of you and you’re thinking right now: “You’re happy that God hasn’t given you what you want?” Yep. Because I’m finally learning the lesson my dad tried to teach me in middle and high school. “I do not know best.” But God does. 

So to all my waiting friends, don’t give into despair, or work yourself silly trying to get what you want in your own power. Instead be content, be excited, that God in His love and wisdom is teaching you, and refining you.

This all sounds great, but what does this look like in real life? For me, one thing is that when I have a practical problem and I need an answer, I google. Right? I love to read others opinions, reviews, and answers. But I’ve been challenged in this season to not focus on others for all my answers. Instead of googling, I’m going to the Word. And God in His goodness, is revealing not only what he wants me to learn in the waiting, but how I should move forward in His will.

He is so good.

Praise the Lord!
Blessed is the man who fears the Lord,
    who greatly delights in his commandments!
His offspring will be mighty in the land;
    the generation of the upright will be blessed.
Wealth and riches are in his house,
    and his righteousness endures forever.
Light dawns in the darkness for the upright;
    he is gracious, merciful, and righteous.
It is well with the man who deals generously and lends;
    who conducts his affairs with justice.
 For the righteous will never be moved;
    he will be remembered forever.
He is not afraid of bad news;
    his heart is firm, trusting in the Lord.
 His heart is steady; he will not be afraid.

Psalm 112